i knew.

i knew what was happening before she did, i think.
i knew when her eyes lost their shine. her body became tired.
i knew when her doctor told us what she had.
i knew when i watched her body become but skin and bones.
i knew when her size 4 jeans became a size 0.
i knew when they told me she had 2 weeks to live.
i knew when i held her hand for the last time.
i knew when i told her i loved her and there was no response.
~
cancer tends to do that. it tends to take the one you love quickly, ruthlessly.
and it leaves you.
stranded.