Roses are red
violets are blue
though my garden is lost
I will make it through
flowers mean something
but the meaning is gone
they bloomed with the dusk
and died with the dawn
a garden of gifts
in good will and hope
not enough people
to help me to cope
too many flowers
surrounding my bed
but I can be brave
my tears stay unshed
the walls are of white
the smell is of fear
my garden is dying
and I am stuck here
roses are sick
violets are crying
I'm in the hospital
They say that I'm dying
This was such an interesting twist on a classic rhyme scheme. I definitely wasn't expecting the ending. Well played, kid!
ReplyDeleteThis is so great! The end especially.
ReplyDeleteThis was really really good. your rhyme is great.
ReplyDeleteAnd I agree the last bit was especially excellent and sad and really well written..
Well done. =]
ReplyDeleteWow. I'm not usually a fan of rhyming poems but you subverted a classic and I am a huge fan of that. And the use of flowers as metaphor is very good.
ReplyDeleteyes. i agree with everything everyone's said. :) your rhyme is very tasteful (like nicole, I'm not usually the fanniest fan) and the ending was unexpected and yet you were totally preparing the reader for it the whole time....stellar use of 100 words.
ReplyDelete